Be a Flower, Not a Crunchy Leaf.

Hello, lovelies!

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How are you doing? Can you believe it is already October? This crazy year has flown by for us having to sit in the house throughout most of it. I hope you all are finding each day a little easier than the last regarding this virus. This will someday just be a part of history, but for now we must stick together and take it day by day.

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In order to protect myself and my mind from wandering, I try my best to stay in the present and take one day at a time. Trust me, I can definitely get ahead of myself and that is where my coach and therapist then tell me to relax and call me out on my spiraling. My mind goes into full rabbit hole mode and thinks of every terrible, possible situation…heehee, oops.

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So what the heck am I writing about today?

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PLANTS! Yes, plants.

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Us as humans are like plants.

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Regardless of the type of plant- weed, flower, tree, etc.- they all require the same things in order to grow and flourish. Water, soil, sunlight, and love, right? All of those factors are necessary. How do you know if the plant is growing well versus growing so/so? How many sprouts have you seen pop up? Are there bunches of flower buds coming up or just one? If you see a ton of flowers, you can assume that this plant is growing in a good spot and has plenty of sunlight, soil, water, and love.

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Now look at you. How are you like a plant? Think about your environment, your health- physical and mental, your support system. Are you a successful plant with multiplying flower buds or a wimpy little leaf trying to maintain its green color? Just because a plant has one or two factors in order to encourage growth, it will not ever match another plant that has all four. Obtaining only sunlight and soil will never be enough to mimic a plant obtaining sunlight, soil, water, AND love. Both plants may survive, but are they both thriving? Of course not.

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Okay, so back to you. When you wake up in the morning how do you feel? Sad and procrastinating getting out of bed? Dreading getting into the car and heading to work? Is a pit forming in your stomach because you are stressed about how the day is going to pan out? Or are you energized and ready for the day? Now I am not saying that you aren’t allowed to wake up in an off mood every now and then, but I am talking about most days. Your overall mental state. Physically how tired are you? Did you get enough sleep or no because you were up for hours just trying to unwind from work? Did you eat dinner or say “screw it?” If this sounds like you then here is reality check, you need to change your life because living like that gets old!

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What is going on in your world that is making you feel miserable? Do you hate your job? Then change it. Do you realize that if something happened to you and you couldn’t fulfill your job duties that most places would find a replacement for you in a second. It just is the way it is. A business must go on, I guess. That is not fair to you. You need to be excited to go to work because you spend a lot of time there. I realized that my old position was causing physical symptoms due to the anxiety I had prior to each shift and I decided that enough was enough. I transferred to my dream department with the kiddos and I have not had those intense feelings at work ever since. My old job was not healthy for me. I had to do what was best for me and I couldn’t be happier.

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My mental state was still suffering even with a job transfer so I had to re-evaluate my life again and see what else I needed to adjust. Your past can influence your adult life tremendously, even more than I realized. Everybody has had different experiences throughout their life, so maybe that is something you need to explore and work through with a therapist. Therapy provides a healthy outlet with zero judgement and a place to feel supported.

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Movement! Hello body, how are ya? Getting comfortable with moving your body is huge. It literally releases feel good hormones and gives you a sense of accomplishment afterwards. It does not have to be intense cardio, either. Do what feels good and works for you.

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Food. Eat multiple times throughout the day, choose healthy options to get all of the good nutrients, avoid fad diets, and do not starve yourself. Low blood sugar does not help anything. But treats once in a while won’t hurt anything.

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Friends. This is huge! Who are you surrounding yourself with? Your friends are extremely important and really do influence you more than you think. It is so important to have a support system; to have friends who you feel loved around and not people who you feel like you are constantly having to impress. That is extra stress that you are placing on yourself for no reason. Would your friends support your decisions? Would they drop everything and help you if you were in trouble? Can you crash on their couch unannounced? Do they celebrate your wins with you or give you the side eye because they’re secretly jealous? C’mon, we’re adults let’s please clap for each other and stop comparing. It is really not cute. Be a positive influence for those around you and surround yourself with other amazing influences and watch your life change for the better, I promise.

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When you incorporate all of these things into your life you will turn into a plant with so many flower buds and flourish in front of your own eyes. Nobody wants to be barely hanging on (like a crunchy leaf) with a crappy job and no support system. You’ll be alive, but not happy. You see what I mean?

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Be a flower, not a crunchy leaf. When you are genuinely happy you can see all of the flowers around you forming and popping up because good energy attracts other good energy.

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XOXO, Cait ❤️

Finding The Real Me

Do you ever just sit back and think about who you are as a person? What your goals and aspirations are? How much you have changed throughout your life? How much you have actually stayed the same?

Life is literally flying by right in front of us. The world is constant hustle and bustle. Anxiety is showing its ugly face because you’re worried about paying your bills, missing a deadline for school or work, trying to incorporate time for a social life since seeing family and friends somehow doesn’t seem to be a top priority in adulthood. Do you even have time to sit and reflect on if you are happy? Do you like the person that you have become or are you currently treading and just trying to keep your head above water?

Self discovery is so important. Making you happy for you is important. De-stressing is important.

Over the last few months, I have been working on finding the real me. I have had exercises handed to me that initiated looking into my past, present, and future self (Thank you, Anxiety Deactivated and therapy for that). How much have I changed? And how much has slipped away without me even noticing it?

When I look at my younger self, I see a care-free little girl playing with dolls and blasting music on my karaoke machine. Today, I am working in the hospital with a house and responsibilities. My life over the last however many years has revolved around alarms making it to class on time, getting good grades on assignments, working long hours, feeling anxious about succeeding in life. I imagine my future self as a confident and happier version of me. Shoulders back, healthy glow, and the stressors of life not controlling my every move. Smiling when walking through the door to my home after a genuinely good day at work.

How the heck do we get to that “future self” though and achieve our goals?

Self-care. Friends, I don’t mean bubble baths and getting your nails done regularly. I am talking about actual meaningful exercises in order to reflect on your day or your week or your month. Fighting against everything inside you saying “it’s too hard and I don’t want to get out of bed today.” Putting in the energy and the work that challenge your positive and negative thoughts. What are some self-care activities?

🌼 Journaling. Guys…this one was so hard for me to come to terms with. For whatever reason I thought it was so weird to have a journal. I mean, I’m not five anymore, I don’t need a “diary.” Welp, let me tell you how much I love writing out my thoughts now. It draws stuff out that I didn’t even know was inside of me. Such a good stress reliever. It also allows me to process through my emotions and understand why I am feeling the way I am in that moment.

🌼 Outside time and activity. I used to play outside when I was a kid, but I was never into sports (LOL…nothing has changed there). I wish I was, but the thought of having to be in a team setting like that stressed me out. Everybody knows that it is good for you to move your body. We are always hearing that, but have you actually incorporated movement into your daily routine? It really helps. Shocking, right? Nope. Being able to release built up tension that you didn’t even know you had is a crazy good feeling, whether it’s running or swimming or even just taking a good walk. Walking is what I have been choosing to add into my day and it’s so nice to admire nature, feel the sunshine, and get some fresh air. You choose what works best for you. I have joint issues and walking seems to be a good fit for now.

🌼 Alone time or social hour. Depending on how you introverted or extroverted you are will determine on what helps you recharge. For me, alone time is my friend. I am definitely introverted and I love being by myself. Being out and about day after day and having to socialize for hours on end is mentally draining. Don’t get me wrong I love being with family and friends a few times a week, but give me a towel to lay by the pool or my speaker to blast my favorite songs with nobody else around and I am so golden. I’ll throw a whole concert in my house just for me and I am okay with that. Karaoke, party of one. 💁🏼‍♀️

🌼 Music. Speaking of concerts and karaoke, music is seriously my favorite way to recharge. It literally feels like I am escaping reality and fully submerged in the lyrics when I am listening to my favorite music. I love to sing, that’s definitely the easiest way for me to express myself…usually alone in my house or car, but nonetheless my favorite. I have realized that if I don’t have music on, that is a sign that my mental state is not where it should be. Something is bothering me, whether I know what it is right away or not.

🌼 Art. I am typically not a huge arts and crafts person, however it is a great way to relieve stress and help focus your attention on something else. Painting, drawing, scrapbooking, photography…you get it. It can be relaxing and also a great way for self expression. I like to doodle in my journal some days. I know that I am usually in a pretty good mood if I break out my markers. Or I am trying my hardest and fighting back to change my attitude and find the positives for the day.

Finding ways to cope within this crazy world are so important. You don’t want to lose your happy and bubbly self in adulthood, instead you want to bring the childhood version of you into your everyday life. I had no idea what the heck that meant before talking through the process in therapy, but I know that I am my happiest and feel like a little kid again when I am singing, when I am joking around with my friends, when I am hanging out with my nephew, when I am playing with my patients at work (I am a pediatric nurse so goofing off and playing at work is actually encouraged. Pretty cool, huh?).

In order for you to become the future version of yourself that you envision in your head, you have to put in the work. If I want to be that confident and happy go lucky version of me walking through that front door, I need to focus on me today. I need to make myself the priority, process through my daily emotions and thoughts, reflect on the good and the bad, find the things that make me the happiest, and bring childhood Cait to the surface.

I urge you to do the same thing. Put in the work now to see the results later. Be the bubbly person you were ten years ago. Don’t allow the stressors of life and society change you. You are worth it. Achieve those goals, girly! You do you! We got this! ✌🏻

XOXO, Cait ❤️