Happy weekend!

Yesterday I spent the day with a friend and her daughter. Sweet little girl, ten years old, just wanted to hang around and be a kid- play video games, go swimming, do her hair. Oh, the memories of childhood.

Everything was going great until she said one sentence that instantly triggered both her mom and I; and boy I am so grateful for her momma stepping up and saying what she said to her.

We were getting into our bathing suits ready to walk our happy butts to the pool and there it was…it came out of her mouth, “I’m fat, look at my belly.” It stopped me mid sentence and as soon as I even processed what she said her mom was already explaining to her that a) she is healthy, b) size does not matter, c) she is beautiful the way that she is, and d) she’s not fat.

Friends, this poor ten year old girl does NOT need to be thinking about her size. She shouldn’t have to worry about being a Barbie doll at this age, or at any age for that matter. Do you realize that body shaming starts in elementary school? Body dysmorphia is a real thing. Self-confidence starts when you’re little and once it’s ruined, it’s hard to get back. Body shaming is all around us because our society is backwards.

I just want to point out some things for a sec…

👑 Whether you want to believe it or not, kids listen to, watch, and absorb everything around them. That means whenever you talk about how tight your clothes are fitting, or how you need to eat a salad, or need to work out more, or need to lose a few pounds, or go on a keto diet to cut out carbs, or can’t have that dessert because it’s going to make you fat, or HOWEVER you decide to word it…kids are listening. They hear you. They see how you talk about your body. They are literally taught that having “meat on their bones” instead of being a size zero is not okay.

👑 Society. Size is everywhere. Clothing stores, magazines, social media, commercials, going to school, or the local pool, or the grocery store…you get the point. People are mean and immediately judge you by the way you look, and going to school is hard enough as it is. Nobody needs magazines thrown in their face showing off America’s next top model or the how this celebrity lost 50 pounds with this new fad diet. It’s just not healthy.

👑 It doesn’t go away. It’s like glue, once you hear it growing up it’s pretty much stuck in your head for life unless you choose to acknowledge and fix it, which by the way is not easy. It takes every ounce of you to fight against the urge to step on the scale, to order the steak that you really want instead of the salad to “not look like a fatty,” to eat breakfast instead of skipping the meal.

What needs to be taught is that-

💛 Nobody is meant to look the same. Bodies come in different sizes. Bodies fluctuate. Being healthy is what is important. And by the way, just because somebody is skinny does not mean that their body is functioning properly.

💛 Words hurt, so let’s teach our kids to be kind and have a little empathy. Not everybody’s metabolism is the same. Not everybody’s immune system is the same. Maybe they have a disease that prevents certain things from working the correct way. Not everybody has access to certain foods, and it might not be their fault. They probably know that they should be eating a little bit healthier, but they’re doing the best that they can. Maybe they are so stressed that their body physically won’t lose the excess weight and they’re trying and fighting everyday. We’re all human. We try the best that we can.

Let’s focus on not focusing on looks, ya feel me? Everybody is beautiful in their own way. Everybody has their own battles that they’re fighting. Everybody bashes themselves and picks each other apart and the younger generations are soaking all of it up. The cycle will never stop if we don’t make an effort now to end it.

Stop gossiping about size and start complimenting smiles. Stop pinching your “fat rolls” and be grateful that your body is healthy. Stop stepping on the scale because it only hurts when you don’t see the number that you wanted to see. It’s okay if you’ve been guilty of any of these things, I know I have, however being able to acknowledge these things, speak up to somebody about it, find accountability, and make an effort to fight the urge, which probably takes everything inside you some days…that’s a win.

Be a role model. Set a good example. Find confidence in your body. Eat because you know it’s fuel and you’re hungry, not because your blood sugar is low and you’re dizzy. Move your body because it makes you feel good, not because you need to sweat out 5 pounds of water weight in order for the scale to show you what you want to see. Talk highly about your body and about how much you love it.

Just remember, kids listen. They absorb the information and want to be like you. It’s a learned behavior that is hard to break. A ten year old shouldn’t have to worry about what she looks likes, she should be worried about if she’s able to have a sleep over with her friends or not.

I get it. I’m in the same boat. I’m not two steps ahead, I’m right here with ya. And some days are better than others.

XOXO, Cait ❤️